This is it!

I did it. I made it. I'm 40 today. Happy Birthday to me! So, this is it, eh? Not much different from yesterday. I did not feel this super sinking feeling in my ute, seems just as it has always been. Yeah, sort of like Y2K... freaked out that the end of the world was coming, and then... nothing. Not even a cyber-fart.

So I'm going to continue to believe that every thing's okay in there, until proven otherwise. In the meantime, it's time to celebrate! Celebrate four decades of being me. Okay, so maybe I don't really want to celebrate all of it; there were certainly moments that I won't mind at all if they never make it into the "public record". But it's been a great ride so far. Looking forward to the next round.

I share my birthday with Michael Jackson, which has always been fun (and hence the nod to him in the image to the right). I also share it with my paternal grandmother, who would have been either 102 or 104 today (or maybe even only 101... she never did set the record straight). My grandmother and I shared a love for geometry and acting, and, I'm hoping I've inherited her fertility too. She had both my father and his older brother in her mid- to late- thirties, and my youngest uncle when in her mid to possibly late forties. I know fertility is not necessarily inherited, but well, it gives me comfort at least to know I come from a line of very fertile women. My maternal grandmother had 9 children. Granted, I am an only child, but I'd like to blame that more on social circumstances than biology (my parents split when I was 8).

I've not been particularly open about TTC with my mom yet, well, she knows we're not preventing, but maybe I should talk to her and see how actively my parents tried to have more children. But then again, that means I'd 1) have to admit to my mother that I have sex and 2) have to admit to myself that my parents had sex. Um, yeah. I might be forty, but there's a part of me that still feels about twelve.